Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Paving the Way

There once was a man on the road to hell.
He paid no attention, stumbled and fell.
Of which it was paved there was no contention.
His road was paved with my good intentions.

When I wrote about resolutions at the beginning of the year, I laid out several goals I plan to accomplish before the end of the first quarter. As I look at the calendar, I am slowly starting to freak out. Rather than meticulously lay out a plan, focus on each step and deliverable, and complete the task at hand, I am instead worrying about whether or not I am going to get it done on time.

If inspiration and determination get things done, then procrastination is their evil nemesis. For some reason, my ability lately to follow through has been horrible. Even the little things are such a struggle. I allow myself to fall into the trap of “I’ll just do it later” and then it never gets done.

As I posted at the beginning of this writing challenge effort, I am severely lacking the discipline I need in order to develop a routine with my tasks. I’ve made putting things off and losing momentum on new projects an art. Heck, I started writing this entry over two hours ago. A little distraction here, a bigger distraction there; and now I find myself pressing just to get this entry posted so I can go to sleep.

What’s really bothersome is that I wake up every morning with the intention of hammering out every item that day. “This is the day I am going to get caught up on all those little, miscellaneous to-do items,” I tell myself. “This is the day I get it all done.” Then it simply never gets done. Those good intentions continue to be magically transformed into pavers for the road to hell. Once I realized I’ve wasted yet another day, I just get so mad and frustrated at myself.

It’s the same with dieting and exercising. I know what I HAVE to do. I know what I NEED to do. Still, for some reason, I let those fall victim to all the things I WANT to do. Better yet, I let those tasks I need and have to do be bundled into the forgotten pile of things I DON’T want to do. Out of sight, out of mind.

The solution is easy. Start on one task and don’t stop until it’s completed. Rather than looking at the whole and allowing myself to feel overwhelmed and shameful, I know I need to break it all into bite-sized pieces that are easier to manage. It’s not that I can’t or don’t know how to get it done. I simply make it too easy for myself to become lazy and/or distracted.

And perhaps me putting these thoughts online will make me feel more accountable for my inactions, and force me to do a better job of planning, executing, and ultimately delivering on every item I set out to complete. I need to transition from laying the bricks on the road to hell to realizing the successful completion of another item on my list.

Getting started is always the hard part. I’m not sure how I will develop that routine I seek, but I am sure I will figure it out …… tomorrow.

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