Somewhere in Between Left and Right

Discretionary warning. The author of tonight’s blog is under the influence of several ounces of beer (he lost count) and several slices of pizza (Otis was buying). He’d like to apologize in advance for any excessive drivel that may be posted. Viewer discretion is advised.

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So. Tonight’s topic is balance. I was fretting because I realized I couldn’t possible write anything interesting (let alone funny and witty) about the inner ear. Then I remembered there are two parts of the ear that support the function of balance: the semicircular canals and the vestibule. What’s really funny - well, funny for someone who’s a twelve year-old boy like me - is that when you say vestibule, you can be referring to one of three things. There’s the vestibule of the ear, which refers to the central part of the labyrinth, as used in the vestibular system. There’s the nasal vestibule, which is the anatomical name for the nostrils. And then there’s the vulval vestibule, which is the anatomical name for the posterior of the labia manora. In summary, when you say vestibule, you’ve got an ear, nose and hooch situation going.

(I told you I was drunk when I wrote this).

Anyways, that’s not at all the type of balance I’m talking about. The question for today is what brings balance into your life? What keeps you sane? What keep you grounded? What keeps you from going off the deep end when things get crazy?

My answer can be described by two simple words: Laundry.

Yep. Laudry. Not so much the cleaning of clothes, but rather the folding of them. I love, love, love folding laundry. Yes, I know, I’m weird (and drunk, might I add). But seriously, there is something Zen-like about taking a basket full of warm, Lavender Serenity scented clothes (even the name is relaxing), and compiling little piles of folded freshness on my bed. It’s an exercise that serves a functional purpose AND clears my mind all at once.

Hey, laugh all you want at my OCD quirk, but I’m telling you, nothing sooths the soul quite like the folding of clothes. It’s one of the rare times I allow myself to be meticulous about being meticulous. I have piles for my white under shirts. I have piles for my regular t-shirts. I have piles for my t-shirts that used to be regular t-shirts but have now been down-graded to the pile in my closet that I use for household chores like mowing the lawn and washing the car. Still, they’re in a pile on their own …. right next to my polo shirts and my wife’s unmentionables.

But in all seriousness, I’d probably lose my mind without my laundry activities. With work pressures, social pressures, commitments to charities and volunteerism, parenting requirements, etc., the one true thing in my life that allows me to absolve my brain of the sensory overload is laundry. It’s my personal sanctuary. It’s my escape from everything else in my life.

So, as I sit here in a feeble attempt to sober up and with an ever so minute sense of sobriety overcoming my buzz (I still can’t feel my toes), I would like for you to consider what it is in your life that offers you balance and serenity, and what can you do to make it a more frequent part of your every day?

And if you ever have mounds of laundry you need folded, just give me a call. You can repay me in beer.